lost

its been a while. the most interesting thing that happened so far was that i was offered a deal with oddfellows to use my photo in a lexus ad in lieu of promoting rugby amongst the young as part as its effort of supporing the wallabies.

a penny for my thoughtsit has been a while. i've been a pc for quite a while, about 2 plus months infact. but somehow i still doubt myself as a good pc, still relying much on my upperstudy. haven't really felt the satisfaction of being one because of the different kind of ops that i do compared to those that support conventional ops. maybe it's because of the different estab and stuff that my coy does and its like starting from scratch, most of which the stuff i've learn from SOCC is irrelavent. i haven't really established a command presense yet because of the many decisions which i cannot fully process through yet. yet with the guys, though i may appear as friends to them, i've no idea how to lead them and change their mentality on the work their doing. been feeling lost since i've posted it although i've fully adapted with unit life and its many privileges that an officer is entitled to. many mistakes were made by me and i kinda feel bad after committing them. urg. maybe it'ld be all be better when i fully take over and learning the lessons all by myself. i think i've lost all the determination and confidence in myself. i want things to be like before, like prior to army, and in bmt. i think ocs sucked all those out of me, my sense of adventure, confidence, cheerfulness and being unafraid of voicing out and doing whats right. maybe it was a mistake to enter ocs.
on the brighter side, i've got CTC hw which i have yet to do and is due for submission next week. and next week i've got outfield. tsk. and also moving over to another bn where arrows are waiting to be shot at me.



oh well heres a pic that i took in vietnam

Morning FIsherman
Non Nuoc Beach, Danang, Vietnam D80 17-50 f2.8